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    How to Shower Like a Man

    Hot 6 years ago

    1. Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile.
    2. Walk naked to the bathroom. If you see your wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the "woo" sound.
    3. Look at your manly physique in the mirror and suck in your gut to see if you have pecs (no). Admire the size of your wiener in the mirror, scratch
    your "privates" and smell your fingers for one last whiff.
    4. Get in the shower.
    5. Don't bother to look for a washcloth (you don't use one).
    6. Wash your face.
    7. Wash your armpits.
    8. Crack up at how loud your fart sounds in the shower.
    9. Wash your privates and surrounding area.
    10. Wash your butt, leaving hair on the soap bar.
    11. Shampoo your hair (do not use conditioner).
    12. Make a shampoo Mohawk.
    13. Pull back shower curtain and look at yourself in the mirror.
    14. Pee (in the shower).
    15. Rinse off and get out of the shower. Fail to notice water on the floor more...

    How to Shower Like a Woman 1. Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks. 2. Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas. 3. Look at your womanly physique in the mirror - make mental note to do more sit-ups 4. Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah, and pumice stone. 5. Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins. 6. Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean. 7. Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced with natural avocado oil. Leave on hair for 15 minutes. 8. Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red. 9. Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash. 10. Rinse conditioner off hair. 11. Shave armpits and legs. 12. Turn off shower. 13. Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower. Spray mold spots with Tilex. 14. Get out of shower. Dry more...

    "CNN found that Hillary Clinton is the most admired woman in America. Women admire her because she's strong and successful. Men admire her because she allows her husband to cheat and get away with it."
    - Jay Leno

    10. I admire your strength, I admire your spunkBut the thing I like best, is getting you drunk.9. Our love will never become cold and hollowUnless, one day, you refuse to swallow.8. I bought this Valentine's card at the storeIn hopes that, later, you'd be my whore.7. This feels so good, it feels so rightI just wish it wasn't $250 a night.6. You're a woman of style, you're a woman of classEspecially when I'm spanking, your big-round-fat ass.5. Before I met you, my heart was so famishedBut now I'm fulfilled... SO MAKE ME A SAMICH!!! 4. Through all the things that came to passOur love has grown... but so's your ass.3. You're a honey... and you're a cutieI just wished you had J-Lo's "booty".2. I don't wanna be sappy or silly or cornySo, right to the point, let's do it, I'm horny! 1. If you think that hickey looks like a blister, you should check out the one that I gave to your sister!

    How To Shower Like A Man:
    1 - Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile.
    2 - Walk naked to the bathroom. If you see your wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the "woo" sound.
    3 - Look at your manly physique in the mirror and suck in your gut to see if you have pecs (no). Admire the size of your wiener in the mirror, scratch your "privates" and smell your fingers for one last whiff.
    4 - Get in the shower.
    5 - Don't bother to look for a washcloth (you don't use one).
    6 - Wash your face.
    7 - Wash your armpits.
    8 - Crack up at how loud your fart sounds in the shower.
    9 - Wash your privates and surrounding area.
    10 - Wash your butt, leaving hair on the soap bar.
    11 - Shampoo your hair (do not use conditioner).
    12 - Make a shampoo Mohawk.
    13 - Pull back shower curtain and look at yourself in the mirror.
    14 - Pee (in the shower).
    15 - Rinse off and get out of the more...

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