250 Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    It takes 250,001 Americans to screw in a lightbulb. 1 to do it..and 250,000 to debate if it was politcally correct.

    A man and wife were celebrating their 50-year anniversary, so the man bought his wife a $250 see-through nightgown.
    Later that night she was getting ready for bed and realized the nightgown was still in the box downstairs.
    Walking naked through the house, she passed her husband who said, "My word, for $250 they could've at least ironed it!"

    A proper man met a beautiful girl and agreed to spend the night with her for $500. When he was ready to leave, he told her that he did not have any cash with him but that he would have his secretary write a check and mail it to her, calling it "RENT FOR APARTMENT."

    On the way to the office he decided that the whole event was not worth the price he agreed to pay, so he had his secretary send a note with a check for $250 and enclosed the following note:

    Dear madam,

    Enclosed find check in the amount of $250 for rent of your apartment. I am not sending the amount agreed upon because when I rented the apartment I was under the impression that:

    1. it had never been occupied.

    2. that there was plenty of heat.

    3. that it was small.

    Last night I found out that it had been previously occupied, that there wasn't any heat, and that it was entirely too large.

    Upon receipt of the note, the girl more...

    Hello out there all people of the world. This is Santa and I just
    wanted to let you know that Christmas may be a little late this
    year. You see, after checking all the boxes and tallying them
    up, I found some problems with the results.
    The first result showed:
    250, 576, 428, 534, 120 Good
    250, 576, 428, 523, 119 Bad
    While the second result showed:
    250, 576, 428, 534, 118 Good
    250, 576, 428, 523, 121 Bad
    So you see, I can't, with good faith, go out and deliver presents
    while knowing I could have made a mistake. Maybe Little Johnny
    was good for once, then again, maybe not.
    So, I have enlisted the help of all my elves and the Mrs. To help
    do a recount. We hope to have this finished up by 5pm on the 24th
    of December, but there is a possibility that it might take longer.
    You see the tally cards were not quite clear to me, although I
    made them myself. I forgot what they meant.
    You know, Good... and more...

    The last one is clearly the most expensive.

    Most Expensive Car Wrecks The biggest loser?

    #5. Bugatti Veyron. .. $1.6 Million
    The Bugatti Veyron is the most expensive production car in history. Only 300 are expected to be produced, and already two have crashed. Above is the first one. The driver thought it was okay to speed at 100 mph in the rain. He only had the car for one week.

    #4. 1959 Ferrari 250 GT TDF. .. $1.65 Million
    This extremely rare classic car, the 1959 Ferrari 250 GT "Tour de France", crashed into a wall at the Shell Ferrari-Maserati Historic Challenge in 2003.

    #3. Ferrari 250 GT Spyder. .. $10.9 Million
    The record price for a 1961 250 GT California Spyder at auction was set on May 18, 2008 when a black one was sold for $10,894,900. So what is one doing buried in the sand? The unlucky owner had it stored near the beach when a Hurricane hit.

    #2. Ferrari 250 GTO. .. $28.5 Million
    The more...

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